Our Family Adoption FAQS

1: Why not domestic, or foster care?

We have prayerfully considered all forms of adoption. For numerous reasons we ruled out two of the three options. While we believe many are led to adopting domestically and from foster care, we also believe many are led to international. This makes sense as we believe (as I’m sure you do) that *all* orphans in the world are deserving of a loving family.

International adoptions have plummeted by up to 70% in recent years due to Hague Treaty implementations, countries closing their programs, and stricter adoption guidelines - which bar many potential parents from adopting. This would be great if it meant that there were simply less children needing families - but the harsh reality is the fact that there are *more* orphans. So if you do the math,  up to 70% less adoptions, yet more orphans than before --- that is simply tragic.

Needless to say, children around the world go without the basic medical care they need. Sometimes, the lack of medical care is life-threatening. More typically, the lack of medical care inhibits these children from living the lives they could and deserve to be living, as well as being less likely to be adopted. And for the most part (in China), they are living in overcrowded orphanages that inhibit them from receiving the stimulation and individual attention they need.

http://holtinternational.org/blog/2015/03/every-child-deserves-love/

2: How long will the process be?

The hardest part to adoption is the wait. While it’s estimated that it will be 12-18 months total to complete the process, it could be even shorter or longer. The process and time estimation in the Waiting Child Program is fairly accurate and dependable. A simple breakdown of the process: the beginning process known as the “paper chase” will take about six months from our application date (which was the beginning of August). This is the process in which an (enormous) amount of paperwork in connection with the home and adoption study is compiled in order to be sent to China. Once it is sent to China, it needs to be reviewed, and accepted. We will then be “logged in” as an official prospective adoptive family. Once that happens, the *real* waiting begins. At that point, we could be matched with a child very soon after, within two months or four months. We’ll certainly keep you updated along the way!

3: How old will he/she be?

Most waiting children in China’s orphanages are nine months and older at the time of referral. We are requesting a 0-2 year old boy or girl. Realistically, he/she will most likely be at least 12 months when they’re referred to us, and will be at least 16 months by the time we are able to bring them home.

4: What kind of needs are mostly represented in the Waiting Child program? 

Manageable needs can be anything from a cleft lip and/or palette, missing fingers/toes, institutional developmental delays, club foot, partial vision loss, a minor heart defect, blood disorders, prematurity, etc. Many needs are non-life threatening, and children that come home are able to live fully-functional healthy lives after whatever (if any) treatment they receive. It’s heart-breaking to think these “needs” are what have kept many children from finding families. Thankfully the stigma against special needs seems to be letting up through various forms of advocacy.

We've researched the needs we're open to, and when we receive our little one's referral (file) we will immediately have a pediatrician specializing in international adoption review the file for us.

5: Since you are adopting from China, you'll be getting a girl right? 

Many people still believe there are more girls waiting to be adopted than boys in China. That certainly used to be the case but times have changed. Most people adopting from China request girls, and there are more boys waiting now than girls. Approximately 90% of babies abandoned in China have some sort of special/medical need -- so boys with any medical or physical concern are abandoned just as often as girls. While we’re not specifying a gender, we know that we’ll most likely receive a referral for a boy. We know the joy both girls and boys can bring. And if we were having a child biologically, we wouldn't be able to pick gender anyhow. God knows who our child is, and that’s all that matters.

6: Why does the process cost so much?

There’s a lot involved in adoption; from background checks, fingerprinting, passports and visas, in-home studies, adoptive parent education classes, tons of legal work,  paperwork, fees paid directly to China once we accept a referral, paperwork authentication, mail costs, international traveling expenses including flight costs, hotel stay, guides/transfer fees/incountry flights, food, medical appointment, a direct donation to the orphanage he/she will come from, and the list goes on (and on and on). The process of adoption is not cheap, nor really should it be. The child themselves do not cost anything. The process does though. Children are *priceless* in the sight of the Lord, and we don’t believe there’s any dollar amount that should keep a child from having a loving family and home. With that said, we have saved, and are continuing to save. The biggest sum of money will come when we are matched with a child and accept their referral (again, that could be two months after our dossier (file) is logged into China’s program, or it could be 12+ months after). At that point, all fees to China, including an orphanage donation is due before we can travel to bring him/her home with us. We’re working with an incredible agency who has a strong background and history in China. We have friends who’ve adopted with this agency, and have reassured us that they are ethical above all, and will walk us through every step - including traveling there and settling back home with our child.

7: How are the kids with this decision?

They are excited! We’ve actually brought up adoption ever since both were very young. Our hearts have always been turned toward adoption. We also believe they are at wonderful ages to welcome a little one into our home. Ms. Cosette is excited for sure, saying she has literally dreamt about it. Micah is excited as well and even more excited thinking of the possibility of a little brother. I sometimes just day-dream of all the things the kids will love to show their little brother or sister. Their garden. Fun on the trampoline. Our nearby little beach and playground. The library. Their favorite restaurant. I’m not quite sure how we’re going to take it all in. Seeing their little face light up at new experiences will become our greatest joy. 

8: Why now?

We've asked that ourselves. We know that “now” doesn’t seem like the greatest of times. Does "now" ever sound like good timing for much of anything? We don’t have all the funds saved up for this adoption. And we’re states away from our family back home.

Those are the reasons why “now” doesn’t seem like a good time. But here are reasons to why it may be: despite not having all the funds saved up - we’ve managed to save a bit. Micah and Ms. Cosette are getting older. Micah will be at least 13 ½ by the time we welcome our little boy/girl home - Cosette will be around 10. Of course, those are significant age gaps as is, and so it’s important to us for them to get in whatever time possible to be with their little brother/sister home before heading off to college, etc. I also think how our parents are getting older. We want them to be in *all* our children’s lives for as long as possible. We’re also at good ages. The reason why we had to wait until August to apply is Billy turned 29 ½ at that point. (You have to both be 30 years old when your dossier is sent to China - that gives us 6 months to complete the required paperwork so that when it is sent, Billy and I both will be 30 (Feb). We’re both young (in adoption terms), healthy, and ready for kid(s). We’ve got the extra room. Safe neighborhood. Great local community sources. Good health insurance. A diverse/adoption-friendly area. But most of all - our hearts are ready. God’s been urging us toward this and we’ve been warned we better listen. We also figure we’ll never be “100% ready” as that’s nearly impossible with most big decisions in life. :-) We'll prepare as much as possible and take one step at a time. So, now’s the time - we’re taking the leap and trusting God full-force.